Baler Twine

© 2008 Bryce Black


Drivin’ home from the home improvement store
On my roof was a bundle of 2 X 4s
I figured I didn’t have very far to go
All at once there arose such a clatter
Slammed on the brakes to see what was the matter
Saw tinkertoys and toothpicks scattered up and down the road. Secure your load with


Baler twine
to bundle ruminant fodder it was designed
and if you got something to securely bind
you oughta try baler twine]

It was Saturday morning and the woodshed was bare
so I bundled myself against the January air
threw my saw on the wagon
and fired up my Ford 8N
But the tractor pulled ahead
and the wagon stayed behind
cuz my doggone hitch pin I could not find
but that ubiquitous substance
came to the rescue again
I hitched ‘er up with


So if yer fan belt’s busted and yer truck is on the blink
or ya got to keep yer toddler from the Drano ’neath the sink
or yer pit bull’s takin’ chunks out of the Fuller Brush man
If you’ve got to connect one object to the next
but yer broke and the hardware store won’t take yer checks
you got to use the technology at hand
May I recommend…


Now the former Soviet Union, it crumbled into bits
and the former Yugoslavia ain’t nothin’ but the pits
and the former human race don’t seem so far behind
It’s a messed up world and I don’t understand it
but maybe we could mend our poor broken planet
with a little bit of love
and a whole lot of baler twine